In the January issue of Good Housekeeping, country singer Luke Bryan shares his secrets for a strong marriage to his wife, Caroline. One of his secrets; he rubs his wife’s feet every night before bedtime! Ed may not give me foot rubs, but he does know how to get out the knots between my shoulder blades. Here are some more secrets for our strong marriage.
♥ We confide in each other. A few years back, Ed’s job was getting rocky. He tried not to talk to me about it too much because he didn’t want me to worry. But one night, he couldn’t hold back any longer. He told me what was happening and how worried he was. As soon as we talked about it, Ed felt so relieved. Yes, I was worried about his job now that I knew what was going on, but we were able to face it together. Many times, if something happens that bothers me, I’ll also confide in Ed and he’ll give me a new perspective on the problem.
♥ We say good night to each other every night. Ed and I have different schedules; he wakes up at 5:00am to get to work by 6:00, while I stay in bed until after he’s already gone. So we don’t always go to bed at the same time. Some nights, he’s more tired that I am and so I’ll stay up to write. Other nights, I’m ready to get in pajamas at the same time my daughters do! But every night, regardless of what time we each go to bed, we tuck each other in and kiss each other good night.
♥ We check in with each other. Unlike many married couples, Ed and I don’t communicate often during the work day. Ed doesn’t like to text, so he doesn’t even have texting on his phone. Instead, we email each other first thing in the morning. As I mentioned above, we might not even see each other before Ed goes to work, so this is how we say, “Good morning!”
♥ We respect each other. Ed and I both lived alone for many years before we got married in our 30’s. We’re used to making our own plans and doing our own things. Just because we are married doesn’t mean we have to be always doing the same thing! Before we make our separate plans, however, we ask each other if it’s okay and check the calendar. We’re not asking permission to make plans; we’re being courteous and respecting each other as individuals. This respect goes beyond the calendar. It extends to other areas of our marriage as well.
♥ We enjoy each other’s company. Although we sometimes do separate activities, such as my book club and Ed’s guys’ night out, we spend time a lot of time together with and without the kids. We genuinely enjoy being together even after eleven years of marriage!
What is your secret for a strong marriage?
*I first met Fawn Weaver, the founder of the Happy Wives Club, a couple of years ago through a community based website. Fawn has traveled around the world and written a book about the best marriage secrets she discovered during her travels. You can grab a copy HERE. Read my honest review of The Happy Wives Club: One Woman’s Worldwide Search for the Secrets of a Great Marriage on Tuesday, January 7!
Read the true story about how Ed and I found love in the book Chicken Soup for the Soul: The Dating Game, available now!
Saying goodnight is something we do too. My husband and I balance one another – one of us will be strong when the other is feeling weak. And sometimes, when it’s needed, we cry together. We also dance together 🙂
This is a lovely list, and has me smiling for you and your husband. Be well and happy new year! ~Catherine
Dancing together is wonderful! I should add that to the list! 😀
Ginny Marie recently posted…Secrets for a Strong Marriage
I think you nailed it perfectly with the secrets for a strong marriage and will tell you even pregnant when I couldn’t reach my feet my husband wouldn’t give me a foot message (he totally anti-fret), but all of the above we do here and thank god that we do have a strong marriage 🙂
Janine Huldie recently posted…Pish Posh Baby Now Taking Pre-Orders for the New Year
My husband gave me a foot massage once, and to be honest, I’d rather he didn’t! 😉
Ginny Marie recently posted…Secrets for a Strong Marriage
Wonderful tips – thank you!
Nain recently posted…Time to work on myself
I’m glad you enjoyed reading them!
Ginny Marie recently posted…Secrets for a Strong Marriage
Wonderful tips to keeping your marriage strong!
Fawn’s book is really inspiring, isn’t it? Looking forward to reading your review!
Theres Just One Mommy recently posted…The Very Best Kids Activities from 2013 Blog Hop
I’m about halfway through the book! I’m enjoying very much!
Ginny Marie recently posted…Secrets for a Strong Marriage
Great tips! I think communication is a HUGE one. My hubby is truly my best friend and we talk about everything – the good, the bad, and the ugly. We don’t always get to say goodnight every night because he travels so much for work and were are often on very different schedules in different time zones. But, we do make a point to talk every day, even when he’s away.
Lisa @ The Golden Spoons recently posted…Happy New Year!
I was surprised early in our relationship when my husband called me his best friend because I hadn’t though about us that way, but it was true! I’m glad that it’s still true. 🙂
Ginny Marie recently posted…Secrets for a Strong Marriage
I like the checking in with each other. Sometimes we go whole workdays or even his business trips, without really communicating. There was one time where he didn’t even tell me what hotel he was staying at!! I guess in the land of cellphones, it didn’t matter as much, but he got an earful that night and it hasn’t happened since.
Honestly, we weren’t married long before our first kid came along, and we have been steadily learning that it’s a lot of work, but good work.
tamaralikecamera recently posted…Just A Bit More Looking Back.
I had Lily just a few weeks after our second anniversary, so we had about 2 years to get used to each other before kids came into the picture! There are some times when it annoys me that Ed doesn’t use his cell phone to just give me a call, but I usually know what he’s up to!
Ginny Marie recently posted…Secrets for a Strong Marriage
Great tips! My hubby and I talk to each other throughout the work day. We also enjoy spending time together. To keep our marriage strong we make sure to schedule a “date night” for just the two of us even if we stay home for it.
Kristina Walters @ Kris On Fitness recently posted…New Year New Goals – Happy 2014!
Date nights are something that Ed and I need to work on! We need to get better at scheduling them, because that alone time is so important.
Ginny Marie recently posted…Secrets for a Strong Marriage
Great tips!! We do the same if we go to bed at different times! And, we check in most days – texting makes it so easy for us!!
Now that our boys are older (12 & 15), they usually do the clean-up after dinner while we sit at the table and chat.
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I love that idea! My daughters are 6 and 9, so they are almost ready to clear the table! They help a little bit, but I need to help them help, if you know what I mean! 😉
Ginny Marie recently posted…Secrets for a Strong Marriage
It’s official! We all adore your husband now :). One of the secrets to our marriage is we genuinely like each other. And I mean alot. He’s my closest confidant. My best friend. Can’t imagine living this life without him. Thanks, Ginny Marie, for joining the Happy Wives Club blog tour. Grateful for you.
I can’t imagine living without my husband, either! It’s been a pleasure to be part of the Happy Wives Club blog tour, Fawn. Keep up the GREAT work!
Ginny Marie recently posted…My Word of the Year