It’s Not Deceit, It’s Survival

Sometimes, I am just a tiny bit deceitful with my children. What mom isn’t, really? I’m with my kids all day, every day, and sometimes…well, read on.

For a little afternoon pick-me-up, I drink Coke in a coffee mug. If the girls knew it was Coke, they would want a taste. They think I’m drinking coffee. I don’t tell them it’s coffee. If Emmy says, “Cawffey, hot!” I just say, “Yes, coffee is hot!” Lily is almost getting to the age where this will not work anymore. I used to try this trick in the afternoon when I taught second grade, and those kids would tell me, “Hey, your coffee has bubbles in it!” I think they were on to me.

I sneak chocolate while they are watching “Sid, the Science Kid.” I cannot make it through the day without chocolate. Can you?

There’s a certain CD that will never be found. Ever.

The same thing goes for certain annoying toys. If asked about them, I calmly say, “Oh, I’m not sure where that went.”

When I say it’s not dessert night, it’s not dessert night, period. The bowl of ice cream I eat in front of the TV is considered a bedtime snack.

When Lily is resisting bed time, I’ll tell her I’m putting on pajamas too. She’ll tell me to go to bed right after she does, and I say, “Yes, I’m going to bed, too.” Three hours later, I’m in bed.

Sometime my little deceits fail, however. For example, telling Emmy that we’re almost home after spending the whole day traveling just doesn’t work. She has her limit and she lets us know.

When Emmy wakes up at 5:15 in the morning, I try telling her “It’s still nighttime. Go back to sleep.” She can hear her daddy getting ready for work, and she knows it’s morning time. I even put her back in her crib, but that just doesn’t fly. Especially now that the morning sun filters in through the window.

That doesn’t mean I’ll stop trying.

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