I like to tell people that I grew up with my cousins, but that’s not necessarily true. The ministry had scattered the family on my dad’s side all over the country; from Alaska to Ohio. I never knew my dad’s parents, in person anyway. They died before I was born, but they live on in stories told frequently by my dad and his brothers and sisters. Despite death and distance, the sisters and brothers remained close. Our families met, when we could, twice a year, at Thanksgiving and at The Lake.
Our family took a week-long vacation at a lake every the summer. The Lake changed from time to time; we started renting cottages at Lake Huron, then one summer rented at Duck Lake (yucky, only lasted one year), Lake Hemlock (a camp, which was cool because the cousins stayed in our own “chalets”), and now, a large house on Lake Michigan. I’m using the term “growing up together” loosely because we didn’t live around the block from each other, much less the same town. As cousins, we loosely grouped ourselves into age groups. We had an older group that all of us younger cousins loved hanging out with, but as you can imagine, the older cousins did their own things away from the younger cousins. Occasionally we would do things together, such as act out plays for our parents or walk to the gas station to buy candy. And cards. We loved to play cards. Our cousin Mark taught us the finer points of the game 500, such as going in the hole just to keep the other pair from getting the bid. (His brother plays the same way.) Mark drove us to the movies. (Spaceballs one summer.) He played the game of Risk with his brother and teased his little sister unmercifully.
As we became adults, the age groups dissipated. Jobs and families scattered us apart, from California to the United Kingdom, but we still kept up with each other. Out of all the cousins, we probably prayed for Mark the most. He was a West Point graduate, and the Army sent him all over the world. We prayed for Mark to safely come back home, and he always did. But then Mark was attacked by an enemy that we didn’t expect. Cancer. We all prayed even harder for Mark and his wife Kathy, and it looked like he was winning the war.
When the email came from my cousin that Mark had died, I didn’t quite believe it. I had to call my dad just to confirm the news. It was a quite a shock to us all.
The last time I saw Mark was at my mother’s funeral. He was in uniform; probably the only time I’d ever seen him in uniform. We usually saw Mark on vacation; out of uniform. My cousins and I were so lucky to grow up with Mark. He was well loved, and he will be missed. Especially when there’s a good card game going on.
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I am truly so sorry for the loss of your cousin and I must admit we have had a few losses here over the years, too and as much as you just can’t believe it, still doesn’t make it an easier to accept in the end. Loved hearing about your family memories and thinking of you this morning.
Janine Huldie recently posted…Confessions Summer Reading List
Thank you so much, Janine! His funeral was July 3 and I was able to go. But I wanted to focus more on my memories, not my trip. I don’t feel like this post does him justice, but I wanted to write something!
Ginny Marie recently posted…Growing Up Together {Spin Cycle}
I am so sorry your cousin died from such a horrible disease. As I get older my relationship with my cousins is getting stronger and stronger. Family is so important and from what you have written you had that instilled in you at a very early age. You are a fortunate woman.
This Busy Life recently posted…Etsy Round-Up: White Wedding
Yes, I’m very fortunate to have such a close family! I’m also close with my cousins on my mom’s side, which is such a blessing as well.
Ginny, I am sorry for your loss. Your post showed the love between your cousins, no matter their age. Interesting, huh? In school we did not play with the older/young kids. When it comes to family, especially cousins, age is no divider.
Did his kids play with yours?
Sharon, The Mayor recently posted…Enough Already, Pat’s Carrot Cake Recipe
Thanks so much, Sharon! The older we get, the less age matters.
Mark had many nieces and nephews that my kids play with whenever we get together, but no children of his own.
Ginny Marie recently posted…Growing Up Together {Spin Cycle}
Ginny, I am sorry for your loss. I hope you cherish the memories of growing up with your cousins, including Mark. Even though you only saw each other every now and then, it is good that you kept in touch. Your closing line in quite funny given the sadness of Mark’s death.
Astrid recently posted…We Don’t Stop Playing Because We Grow Old
I have a lot of memories of Mark playing cards! I imagine he’s playing a hand right now with his dad, my uncle, both in heaven now.
Ginny Marie recently posted…Growing Up Together {Spin Cycle}
What wonderful memories of your cousins and growing up together. Your post is filled with heartfelt emotions. It brought to mind the canasta games I shared with one of my cousins. I had called her just yesterday with birthday wishes. She is 71. Our visit just picked up as if we still saw each other regularly. God’s blessings on your family.
Janice recently posted…Growing
Thanks, Janice! I just saw a cousin I haven’t seen in about 10 years at the funeral, and nothing has changed! Family is great, isn’t it!
Ginny Marie recently posted…Growing Up Together {Spin Cycle}
Yes, Ginny, family is wonderful. I cannot imagine the journey without my sisters, cousins, aunts and uncles. My best friend from childhood is a cousin. She was in my wedding. Went to her brother’s funeral in February. He died of cancer, too. Your blog about your cousin Mark was beautiful.
Janice recently posted…Growing
So sorry about Mark. The memories sound almost like you could touch them. I have a million cousins but they’re scattered from four family sides so there wasn’t ever that chance to all be together at once. My parents have five kids, four grandkids, and surely some more on the way. I’m hoping for memories like you described. Memories still to come.
Tamara recently posted…My Husband Takes Over My Blog To Answer Ten Questions!
Oh, yes, I’m sure you will have lots of memories headed your way! I think you have a great start already. 🙂
Ginny Marie recently posted…Standing in Line with Ed
Sorry to hear about the loss of your cousin. It sounds like you have a lot of great memories of him though which are so special!
Becca recently posted…Movie Review – Short Term 12
Thank you, Becca. I’m glad we do have so many memories!
Ginny Marie recently posted…Standing in Line with Ed
What a lovely tribute to your cousin! I was not physically close to my cousins on my dad’s side, but whenever we get together we have an absolute blast! My kids and their kids love playing together ever two years at our family reunion. I wish we lived closer, but maybe that would spoil the magic?
Rabia @TheLiebers recently posted…Snowballing Your Debt: It Really Makes Cents
Thank you, Rabia! I wish we lived closer to my cousins, too, because my daughters love playing with their kids. I don’t think living closer would spoil the magic! 🙂
Ginny Marie recently posted…Standing in Line with Ed
Oh now you got me teary. Didn’t see that coming. So sorry for the loss of your cousin. But what amazing memories you have of The Lake!
Gretchen recently posted…This Week on the Spin Cycle: 7/14 – 7/20
We do have great memories! We’re heading to The Lake this weekend to make some more memories. 🙂
Ginny Marie recently posted…Standing in Line with Ed
So sorry to hear about Mark. ((HUGS)) Growing older has brought me to a place in my life where I know that people we love will be leaving us. Didn’t think this way years ago. I know that Mark’s time here was too short and I’m thankful you have these beautiful memories of him.
Deborah Pucci recently posted…WEDNESDAY HODGEPODGE
Thank you so much, Debby. It was way too early to lose such a good man. You’re definitely right about growing older, sadly.
Ginny Marie recently posted…Standing in Line with Ed